A hectic year it's been.
Jan. 2nd, 2005 05:24 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
netquiddlerLadies and gentlemen, the stories you are about to see are mostly new. The groceries have been changed to protect their expiration dates.
It was Saturday, January 1. It was warm in South Jersey. We were working the day watch out of front end. My partner is Tetra, the boss is Janet, Lady of the Night. My name's Link; I'm a cashier.
Produce Follies
Link: *scanning groceries, key entering produce as needed*
Dummy: What are you DOING? You're supposed to weigh them all together, they're the same price!
L: *looks at the red, green, orange, and yellow peppers* I'm sorry, sir, but company policy dictates that we must weigh the different colors separately, for inventory purposes. *lo and behold, the green ones are $1.49 a pound when the rest are $4.99 a pound*
D: But you should ring them all as green, and save me money!
L: Sir, if I did that and my boss happened to see it, I could be fired.
D: I want to speak to your manager!
Fun With Coupons
Tetra: Good evening! Do you have your Price Plus card or coupons?
Atta Bitch: No.
T: *scan scan scan* Okay, your total is $X.XX.
AB: Credit.
T: *sends payment through, goes back to bagging...receipt prints, drawer pops*
AB: I have a coupon! *thrusts a coupon for $5 dollars off an order at cashier*
T: Okay, you've already paid so you'll have to...
AB: Theres no way you can take my coupon off!?
T: No you've already p...
AB: This is ridiculous! I better not have to wait in line at the courtesy desk.
T: Heres your...
AB: Where is my reciept!? Give it to my son!
T: *hands receipt to her son who leaves to go to the courtesy desk*
AB: Don't you know how to do your job right?
T: Excuse me? I asked you at the start of your order if you had any c......
AB: *getting into T's face, snapping her fingers and such* You should of asked me if there was anything else you could of done for me.
T: What? I asked you for any coupons at the start of your order. It's not my fault that...
AB: You white girls are all the same. Treating black women like shit.
T: Are you kidding me? You're the one who swiped your c...
AB: Everytime I come here and get a white cashier I get treated badly.
T: *losing her patience* Ma'am, there was nothing I...
AB: Blah blah, black power, blah blah.
T: CAN YOU SHUT UP AND LET ME FINISH A SENTENCE!?
AB: *stares at T with her mouth hanging wide open*
T: I asked you if you had any coupons at the start of your order. It's not my fault you remembered a coupon AFTER you paid. Theres nothing else I can do for you. Standing here and yelling at me will get you nowhere.
AB: You... you're racist!
T: If that's what you would like to think.
AB: I'm going to customer service to complain about you.
T: *yelling after her* I HOPE THERES NO LINE!
Debit Humor
Link: *scans candy bar* Okay, that'll be 53 cents, sir...
Change Bandit: *swipes debit card and tells it $300 cash back*
L: *sees cash back and would have spit-took*
Change Chuckles
Tetra: *trying to look interested during a lull*
Crazy Guy: *running like there's a fire in his pants* Miss! Miss!
T: Can I help you?
CG: *hands piece of paper* I need two $10s to break this $20.
T: *looks at... the faded Target receipt?* Where is the $20 I'm supposed to break?
CG: I just handed it to you!
T: This is a piece of paper?
CG: Nevermind, I want one $10 and two $5's!
T: ....
CG: Where's my money!?
T: *slowly reaching for the phone to call security as CG basically sprints out of the store*
Foodstamps, Anyone?
Link: *scans groceries* Your total today is $XXX.XX...
Foodstamps Lady: It'll be on my Families First card.
L: Okay. *sends to PinPad*
FL: Why isn't it letting me pay for everything?
L: *looks at receipt* Ma'am, the only thing it's not letting you buy on food stamps is the dog food.
FL: But that's for us to eat! The steaks are for the dog!
L: I'm sorry, but foodstamps can only be used to buy things for human consumption.
FL: But they always let us pay for the dog food with foodstamps! I want to see your manager!
How To Bag Groceries
Older Lady: *comes up with about 20 items, including things like a gallon of milk and a carton of orange juice*
Tetra: *scans card, opening spiel, yadda yadda*
T: *starts bagging, fills one bag, starts on another*
OL: *grabs T's wrist* I only want one bag.
T: Okay, I'll try. Please don't touch me.
OL: Sorry.
T: *fits everything into one bag, but it'll obviously break*
OL: This bag is too heavy!
T: Alright, I'll just move some stuff into another ba...
OL: I only want one bag!
T: Okay, it's there in front of you, have a nice day!
(more stories will show up later!)
It was Saturday, January 1. It was warm in South Jersey. We were working the day watch out of front end. My partner is Tetra, the boss is Janet, Lady of the Night. My name's Link; I'm a cashier.
Produce Follies
Link: *scanning groceries, key entering produce as needed*
Dummy: What are you DOING? You're supposed to weigh them all together, they're the same price!
L: *looks at the red, green, orange, and yellow peppers* I'm sorry, sir, but company policy dictates that we must weigh the different colors separately, for inventory purposes. *lo and behold, the green ones are $1.49 a pound when the rest are $4.99 a pound*
D: But you should ring them all as green, and save me money!
L: Sir, if I did that and my boss happened to see it, I could be fired.
D: I want to speak to your manager!
Fun With Coupons
Tetra: Good evening! Do you have your Price Plus card or coupons?
Atta Bitch: No.
T: *scan scan scan* Okay, your total is $X.XX.
AB: Credit.
T: *sends payment through, goes back to bagging...receipt prints, drawer pops*
AB: I have a coupon! *thrusts a coupon for $5 dollars off an order at cashier*
T: Okay, you've already paid so you'll have to...
AB: Theres no way you can take my coupon off!?
T: No you've already p...
AB: This is ridiculous! I better not have to wait in line at the courtesy desk.
T: Heres your...
AB: Where is my reciept!? Give it to my son!
T: *hands receipt to her son who leaves to go to the courtesy desk*
AB: Don't you know how to do your job right?
T: Excuse me? I asked you at the start of your order if you had any c......
AB: *getting into T's face, snapping her fingers and such* You should of asked me if there was anything else you could of done for me.
T: What? I asked you for any coupons at the start of your order. It's not my fault that...
AB: You white girls are all the same. Treating black women like shit.
T: Are you kidding me? You're the one who swiped your c...
AB: Everytime I come here and get a white cashier I get treated badly.
T: *losing her patience* Ma'am, there was nothing I...
AB: Blah blah, black power, blah blah.
T: CAN YOU SHUT UP AND LET ME FINISH A SENTENCE!?
AB: *stares at T with her mouth hanging wide open*
T: I asked you if you had any coupons at the start of your order. It's not my fault you remembered a coupon AFTER you paid. Theres nothing else I can do for you. Standing here and yelling at me will get you nowhere.
AB: You... you're racist!
T: If that's what you would like to think.
AB: I'm going to customer service to complain about you.
T: *yelling after her* I HOPE THERES NO LINE!
Debit Humor
Link: *scans candy bar* Okay, that'll be 53 cents, sir...
Change Bandit: *swipes debit card and tells it $300 cash back*
L: *sees cash back and would have spit-took*
Change Chuckles
Tetra: *trying to look interested during a lull*
Crazy Guy: *running like there's a fire in his pants* Miss! Miss!
T: Can I help you?
CG: *hands piece of paper* I need two $10s to break this $20.
T: *looks at... the faded Target receipt?* Where is the $20 I'm supposed to break?
CG: I just handed it to you!
T: This is a piece of paper?
CG: Nevermind, I want one $10 and two $5's!
T: ....
CG: Where's my money!?
T: *slowly reaching for the phone to call security as CG basically sprints out of the store*
Foodstamps, Anyone?
Link: *scans groceries* Your total today is $XXX.XX...
Foodstamps Lady: It'll be on my Families First card.
L: Okay. *sends to PinPad*
FL: Why isn't it letting me pay for everything?
L: *looks at receipt* Ma'am, the only thing it's not letting you buy on food stamps is the dog food.
FL: But that's for us to eat! The steaks are for the dog!
L: I'm sorry, but foodstamps can only be used to buy things for human consumption.
FL: But they always let us pay for the dog food with foodstamps! I want to see your manager!
How To Bag Groceries
Older Lady: *comes up with about 20 items, including things like a gallon of milk and a carton of orange juice*
Tetra: *scans card, opening spiel, yadda yadda*
T: *starts bagging, fills one bag, starts on another*
OL: *grabs T's wrist* I only want one bag.
T: Okay, I'll try. Please don't touch me.
OL: Sorry.
T: *fits everything into one bag, but it'll obviously break*
OL: This bag is too heavy!
T: Alright, I'll just move some stuff into another ba...
OL: I only want one bag!
T: Okay, it's there in front of you, have a nice day!
(more stories will show up later!)
