Dear Customers... (well, mostly)

Dear old man customer:

My fellow cashier can understand you quite clearly, and can speak back. The girls... cannot. So please, look at the face of my fellow cashier, and do not stare at the girls. You just managed to skeeve out my fellow cashier.

Bleep off and die,

Your cashier's coworker.

Dear moo customer:

Your WIC checks entitle you to 16 and 15 cans of formula, respectively. Now, obviously, your young one has a specific amount of formula the doctor has prescribed for it. Instead, you decided to only get enough so that the total would not go over $50 so you could collect credit for Baby Bucks without fear of them being used. Why put your kid in danger? Just get the WIC people to make it three checks and you don't have a problem.

No love,

Your cashier.

Dear coworkers:

Not sending anybody to relieve me for 45 minutes after my shift was over is deplorable. I was to get off my shift at 2 PM, yet it was 2:45 when I got to clock out. I don't mind the extra 45 minutes, but next time, tell me you want me to stay longer? Also, yelling at me because I didn't remind you my shift was over is not a good thing. My shift schedule is right in front of you, and you were too busy reading jokes to have someone relieve me.

No love,

Your supposed lackey.

Dear old lady customer:

I was waiting in line with four bottles of soda, to pay for them, and then to leave. I do not think your idea of whacking me in the back of the knee with your cane was very amusing, seeing as it made me drop to one knee. Meanwhile, you decided to take my place in line. Had I been a violent person, I'd consider fighting back, but at that point, I really just wanted to get out of there. Here's hoping you got yourself caught on tape so we can ban you.

Bleep off and die,

The customer who *was* in front of you.

Dear Customers... (well, mostly)

Dear old man customer:

My fellow cashier can understand you quite clearly, and can speak back. The girls... cannot. So please, look at the face of my fellow cashier, and do not stare at the girls. You just managed to skeeve out my fellow cashier.

Bleep off and die,

Your cashier's coworker.

Dear moo customer:

Your WIC checks entitle you to 16 and 15 cans of formula, respectively. Now, obviously, your young one has a specific amount of formula the doctor has prescribed for it. Instead, you decided to only get enough so that the total would not go over $50 so you could collect credit for Baby Bucks without fear of them being used. Why put your kid in danger? Just get the WIC people to make it three checks and you don't have a problem.

No love,

Your cashier.

Dear coworkers:

Not sending anybody to relieve me for 45 minutes after my shift was over is deplorable. I was to get off my shift at 2 PM, yet it was 2:45 when I got to clock out. I don't mind the extra 45 minutes, but next time, tell me you want me to stay longer? Also, yelling at me because I didn't remind you my shift was over is not a good thing. My shift schedule is right in front of you, and you were too busy reading jokes to have someone relieve me.

No love,

Your supposed lackey.

Dear old lady customer:

I was waiting in line with four bottles of soda, to pay for them, and then to leave. I do not think your idea of whacking me in the back of the knee with your cane was very amusing, seeing as it made me drop to one knee. Meanwhile, you decided to take my place in line. Had I been a violent person, I'd consider fighting back, but at that point, I really just wanted to get out of there. Here's hoping you got yourself caught on tape so we can ban you.

Bleep off and die,

The customer who *was* in front of you.